Keeping Up With the Jameses

Adventures in Modern Day Motherhood

An Inconvenient Week November 10, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — mommyoffive @ 12:07 pm

Why hello there!  What’s that?  You’re wondering why I’ve suddenly dropped off the face of the earth just as my life was becoming waaaaay less chaotic?

Let’s just say I’ve been enjoying my down time.  And catching up on sleep.  Did you know that it is actually possible to sleep for more than 2 – 3 hours a night?

Also, I’ve been reconnecting with my favorite TV characters.  Ah, Damon, watching your poor little vampire heart break was almost as sad as finding out that my kids had eaten all of my cookie dough ice cream without even leaving me one scoop.  And Maks – only you could get away with throwing a tantrum like that and still have me love you.  But you’re pushing it, big boy.

Anyway…. I know that I promised election night coverage, but I am beginning to despair of professional pictures ever showing up on the website.  So we’ll start smaller, with some exciting tidbits from the week before the election.  That way you’ll see how truly nutso I am.

So.  The last week of October found me right smack dab in the middle of running the school book fair.  Picture me in a school (my natural habitat) interacting with hundreds of adoring children (because trust me, when you are the book fair lady the kids all think you are a rock star) and surrounded by thousands of new books (mmmm…new books).  It’s enough to put me in a near constant state of nirvana.  Which unfortunately clouded my judgment enough that I decided that it would be a good idea to read the entire Hunger Games series in three days.  While running the book fair.  And trying to survive the final week of the campaign.

Because, yes, the campaign was in full swing that week.  Mike was traveling the state in his Mike Mobile (yep, we’re just that cheesy).  Since I was supposed to be in charge of a third of the state, I should have been on the road with him.  Instead, I put my trust in my AWESOME county coordinators and sent Mike off on his own, since books will always trump politics.  And maybe Mike wasn’t totally on his own.  The rest of the ground game crew went along for the ride (thanks for covering for me, Bill and Heather).

I did manage to sneak one stop in, though.  Mike was headed to my home town, and I knew that I HAD to show up at that one, since it was very possible that no one else would.  Seriously.  I have never seen a more politically apathetic area in my life.   But to my utter surprise, and thanks to several of us spending hours and hours and hours on the phone begging and pleading to get people to attend, twenty people actually showed up to accost meet Mike.  There were also two college students filming a video about an alien takeover of the planet who asked Mike if he would do a mock interview with them.  He took “being a good sport” to a whole new level and accommodated their request.  They returned the favor by sticking around and asking important questions like:  I haven’t been paying any attention to politics at all, but I probably should.  How do I get registered to vote?  Um, ladies, the election is in four days.  It’s too late to register.  And WHY ON EARTH HAVEN’T YOU BEEN PAYING ATTENTION?!?!

OK, Jennifer, just breathe.  Relax…

Next, Mike faced an angry voter who let him know how wonderful our previous senator was and how angry she was that Mike was trying to take his spot and that she thought he was totally incompetent.  She then fired question after nit-picky question at him.  I actually think that he might have won her over by the end of his visit.  Maybe.

And then…and I am NOT kidding…someone showed up in a Dick Cheney mask.  Only in Carbon County.  Right about then is when Greg (campaign superman) turned to me and asked, “Hey Jennifer, didn’t you grow up here?” with a huge grin on his face.  Not.  Funny.

With the totally humiliating campaign stop over, I returned home to find four bushels of apples waiting for me.  Don’t judge me.  They were practically free.  They were also seconds, which meant that they had to be canned immediately.

It was also the day before Halloween, which meant that pumpkins had to be carved and seeds needed to be roasted.  And campaign emergencies were happening left and right.  And the kids had rediscovered our Halloween costume boxes and were each changing their minds about what they were going to wear with lightening speed.

So, I carved pumpkins while sending out emergency campaign correspondence, and made apple pie filling while running financials for the book fair.

We made applesauce on Halloween Day.  Lots and lots of applesauce.  All day long.  We were also watching the weather go from good, to bad, to totally ridiculous.  The kidlets each tried on about three different costumes before settling on their final outfits.  Sarah dressed as Dorothy (from the Wizard of Oz) and headed off to work.  She was NOT happy about having to work on Halloween night.  Daniel went as a zombie to a Halloween party with some friends.  He didn’t even need a costume.  He already had the weird zombie walk and nasty scars.  How convenient!  Emma went as Bunnicula.  Joshua, who had previously made himself a microwave costume, decided that it wouldn’t be practical for trick-or-treating and instead went as a Ninja.  Jakester went as an alligator.  And then there was Bitsy.  Since it was raining, and freezing, and COOOLD, (and did I mention freezing?), and she seemed to have some kind of stomach bug, Todd thought that he would just take her to a few select houses on our street and then bring her home to enjoy her spoils in the warmth of our house.  Yeah, right.  As he headed back out the door with Jakob, he was followed by a very determined tiny pink unicorn.  She was not going to be left behind.  Not when there was candy at stake.

In the midst of all of this, I made space creatures for dinner:

(Um, yeah.  So we still didn’t have a camera at this point, but you’ll notice that I had the presence of mind to have Daniel take a picture of the food with his cell phone camera.  I did not, however, have the presence of mind to have him take pictures of my actual children.  Bad mommy.  Bad, bad mommy!)

On Sunday, Jakob wasn’t feeling well.  We all assumed that he had eaten too much candy.  We had totally forgotten about Bitsy’s stomach bug from the day before.

But on Sunday night….we were awakened by Daniel, letting us know that Joshua had just thrown up on his bed.  Then Daniel threw up.  Then Emma.  Then Jakob again.  Then Daniel…for two solid hours in the middle of the night, we had four children simultaneously puking.  At one point, we just had to sit on our bed and laugh.  We had no idea there could be so much vomit in so little time.

At about three a.m., the barf fest seemed to slow down a bit.  I lay in bed, hoping and praying that it was just a kid bug.  No dice.  I spent the hours between 5 and 9 a.m. praising the porcelain gods.  Over and over and over.

I was supposed to be wrapping up the book fair.  That would not have gone well.  My poor co-chair had to do it by herself.  I’m sorry, Jane.

And did I mention that this was the day before the election?  And that I was supposed to be spending the day in Important Meetings?  And that there was really no way I could get out of them?

So at about ten a.m., I begged Todd (who had stayed home from work to help clean up pukapalooza) to go buy some Sprite and dragged my sorry self into the shower, where I continued to throw up.  I know.  I’ll say it for you.  Ewwwww.  By eleven, I was out the door, armed with ziplog baggies, Sprite, and pretzels.  At the office, I warned everyone to keep a wide berth and gathered supplies for a trip to Davis County.  Luckily, at that point I was starting to feel just a *tiny* bit better.   I made the trip successfully, returned to the office to make some phone calls, and then settled in for our pre-election day meeting.

We went over Mike’s victory speech, talked him into cutting references to Darth Vader, made plans for the next day (everything needed to be executed with clock-like precision), were all reminded to schmooze, schmooze, schmooze (Remind me to tell you one day about how good I am at schmoozing.  It’s a gift, really.), and talked about security issues involving the crazy person who was stalking Mike’s wife.

And I didn’t throw up on anybody.  It was truly a proud moment for me.

Stay tuned for Election Day – with or without pics.

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