Keeping Up With the Jameses

Adventures in Modern Day Motherhood

Sometimes I Think I Might Need Professional Help November 30, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — mommyoffive @ 9:28 am

The early application for Sarah’s number one college choice (Go Big Blue – you were robbed on Saturday, ROBBED I say!)  (Not that I’m bitter.) (Stupid refs.) is tomorrow, so last night found me and Sarah up until the wee hours of the morning putting the final touches on her paper work,  because HEY – why plan ahead? (No, I wasn’t filling it out for her.  I just served as her sounding board/editor.)

Once I was finally given permission to go to bed, I had a dream…

I was back in college.  And wow – the dorms had definitely changed since I was there last.  I spent some time wandering around the magical campus (really, it was magical), and then headed off to class, where Dr. Crush was my instructor.  Only this time he was a Ph.D. instead of an M.D.

At least I think he’s an M.D.  Maybe he’s a D.O.  Now I’ll have to go check…

Yep.  He’s an M.D.  Listed like this:  C. Turtle Crush, M.D. – Oculoplastic and Orbitofacial Surgeon.

Now I’m wondering – are all ophthalmologists M.D.s?  Let me check…

Nope.   They can be D.O.s.

Which do you think is better, an M.D. or a D.O?  I’m all about the D.O. myself.

Anyway, Dr. Crush was my professor and my assignment was to take a map of the United States that had the names of the states, capitols, and other important landmarks all scrambled up (Arkansas was written upside down on California’s spot) and properly label it.

I attacked the task with gusto and was totally wowing Dr. Crush with my awesome geographical knowledge when I woke up and thought,


“Where did THAT come from?”

And then I remembered that fateful night after my first surgery when I couldn’t list all fifty states in under ten minutes.

Apparently I was so traumatized by my poor showing that I’m still dreaming about it all these months later.

I’m not obsessive at all.

But I’m starting to think that maybe I need something new to focus on now that the campaign is over.


Tip-toeing off to call a psychologist now.  (They can have either a Ph.D. or Psy.D, just in case you were wondering.  But a psychiatrist can be either an M.D or a D.O.  Not that I’d ever go to one.  I clearly don’t need meds.  Clearly.)

PS – I can list all fifty states in under six minutes now.  And that’s without practicing.  And with my atrocious typing skills.

Nope, not obsessive at all.



4 Responses to “Sometimes I Think I Might Need Professional Help”

  1. janae Says:

    1) I know I say this every time, but you are hilarious!!

    2) You need to learn the states song. I just took the test and my first time I did it in 5 min, my second in 2:45. (And my typing ain’t so hot…I had to type almost every state twice because of typos.) It’s the song, I tell you. Alphabetical order and all. 🙂

  2. mommyoffive Says:


    Now I’m going to spend of the day learning the states song and trying to beat 2:45. I hope you’re happy. 😉

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